I Hate Theatre
It's dead season in the world of theatre this month. While these vast indoor spaces are lying, one presumes, empty, why not use them for something everyone can enjoy - like Laser Quest?
| 15 Jun 2006
Laser Quest is superb. It has all the skill and cunning of paintball but without the mess and the 30-mile ride out of town, and all the adrenalin and intensity of war but without the significant risk of death. For those of you who've never heard of it – actually, you're all sufficiently young and happ'nin' to know what it is. Anyway, it's mega.
It's dead season in the world of theatre this month. Most places are shutting their doors and hibernating before the Edinburgh festival and its attendant talent vacuum comes to town. The Traverse, the Royal Lyceum and the Arches, to name but a few, have a gaping abyss where their programme from mid-June onwards should be. This obviously shouldn't perturb anybody unduly. It's not as if Topshop is closing for the summer or anything. But here's my idea. While these vast indoor spaces are lying, one presumes, empty, why not use them for something everyone can enjoy - like Laser Quest? Wouldn't it be a heartwarming sight to see Edinburgh's youth engaging at close-quarters in the stalls, or shimmying up the lighting rigs, or sniping at each other from the upper circles? They're always going on about how they want to get kids into theatres.
It's such a good idea I decided to suggest it to the theatres concerned. At the Royal Lyceum a posh voice admitted complete ignorance of Laser Quest. After listening to a detailed and protracted explanation of my plan, he told me in unimpressed tones that they "already run an extensive youth programme" and "would probably never present something like that ourselves."
It was a different story at the Traverse, where acting manager Jennifer Cummins seemed genuinely interested. "That's excellent. I'll definitely pass that on as an idea, no worries." So, be warned. The next time you pop down your local playhouse to see what's on, the entertainment might well be of an intergalactic variety. Anyway, making the world a better place really puts you in the mood for some retail therapy, so I'm off to Topshop while the opportunity's still there…
It's dead season in the world of theatre this month. Most places are shutting their doors and hibernating before the Edinburgh festival and its attendant talent vacuum comes to town. The Traverse, the Royal Lyceum and the Arches, to name but a few, have a gaping abyss where their programme from mid-June onwards should be. This obviously shouldn't perturb anybody unduly. It's not as if Topshop is closing for the summer or anything. But here's my idea. While these vast indoor spaces are lying, one presumes, empty, why not use them for something everyone can enjoy - like Laser Quest? Wouldn't it be a heartwarming sight to see Edinburgh's youth engaging at close-quarters in the stalls, or shimmying up the lighting rigs, or sniping at each other from the upper circles? They're always going on about how they want to get kids into theatres.
It's such a good idea I decided to suggest it to the theatres concerned. At the Royal Lyceum a posh voice admitted complete ignorance of Laser Quest. After listening to a detailed and protracted explanation of my plan, he told me in unimpressed tones that they "already run an extensive youth programme" and "would probably never present something like that ourselves."
It was a different story at the Traverse, where acting manager Jennifer Cummins seemed genuinely interested. "That's excellent. I'll definitely pass that on as an idea, no worries." So, be warned. The next time you pop down your local playhouse to see what's on, the entertainment might well be of an intergalactic variety. Anyway, making the world a better place really puts you in the mood for some retail therapy, so I'm off to Topshop while the opportunity's still there…