Catfish And The Bottlemen – The Balcony

Alright, who forgot to fill in the landfill? Evidently news of indie’s death has yet to reach Llandudno’s shores, where woefully-named quartet Catfish And The Bottlemen formulated their asinine bluster. For the record, that’s ‘indie’ as a byword for ‘lads with winklepickers and guitars’; a genre seemingly impervious to destruction regardless of how many dubsteps you throw at it. One can only marvel at the soaraway successes that frontman Van McCann clearly anticipates, thanks to lyrics like, “I wanna love you / But I’ve no time for your friends / They can fuckin’ do one.” What a charmer.

Fans of The Bottlemen will doubtless point to tracks like Homesick or Coccoon, citing strong craftsmanship and solid hooks in their defence – too bad they sound like The Walkmen rooting through Alex Turner’s discarded teenage notebooks. “Discard everything I said,” Van offers helpfully, a mere two lines into the album. Well, who are we to refuse an offer like that? [Will Fitzpatrick]