The Mac Twins: Comedy Spotlight

If you guys had been separated at birth, which one of you would have grown up to be a rough and ready Karate crime-lord, and who would have been the sensitive aerobics instructor with a heart of gold?

"Alana is obsessed with the Kray brothers so she’d be a fantastic lord of crime (NB Twins only follow other identical twins – never trust someone that did not share a placenta). Her round kick leaves a lot to be desired, but she does own many a black belt. And who doesn't aspire to the heady heights of Jane Fonda's leotards? There is both lycra and street fighting in the show – excellent line of questioning."

Street Fighter is well known for having some of the most appropriate backgrounds to hold an impossible Kung-Fu tournament (airfields, volcano rims, Chinese laundrettes etc). Having grown up in Edinburgh, which locations would you consider best suited to battling an electric jungle man or a Sumo wrestler?

"Sumo wrestlers should ALWAYS be fought in a chip shop – chippy sauce for blinding and all the deep fried goods one could ask for, for both distraction and oil slippage. Electric jungle man is slightly more tricky, although we have heard Greyfriars Bobby comes to life by slipping a copy of The Skinny up his bum – and we’ve heard he’s feisty."

Have you ever set a comical parent trap?

"We preferred the role of 'escapees' in our youth. An elaborate escape plan, aged two, resulted in a toddler rampage around Buckstone with only nappies for armour."

It’s a NASA fact that when nature or science takes a thing and duplicates it, there's a 99% chance the copy will be evil. Which of you is the evil one and exactly how evil are you?

"Five weeks prior to our due date Alana knew her time had come; she grabbed all the white blood cells, set the waters free and left Lisa for dead in our cushioned, palette home. Then again, after several failed attempts at breaking her own arm, Lisa did graffiti Alana’s treasured 'Stooky' as she lay in a peaceful slumber in a cruel act of envy. You decide.

"Envy is in fact Alana’s character in the show – MAJOR dramaturgical error on our part there."

After a mysterious explosion at the Roslin Institute's cloning facility, an army of Dolly sheep approach the city. Explain how you would karate all the punk and thug sheep standing between you and the final-boss Dolly?

"Sheep fight as follows….

"We'd slow dance with them to Usher albums and make 'em love sick on riffs. As for Dolly, she is naturally defeated with a pair of tweezers, knitting needles and a long woollen scarf."

Have either of you considered growing a goatee or not shaving your armpits? (I'm unclear on the current rules for evil twin identification).

"Lisa very very seldom shaves her armpits – sweat collection is considered a lucrative career by the WCC (World Cloning Confederation). This year's annual report on evil twin identification believes it's all in the belly button."

If Alana were put on a boat at the Firth of Forth and her kidnappers planned to sell her into servitude, which comedian would Lisa replace her with as full-time twin? (And vice-versa).

"Have been thinking all day about who we’d be sold to – what a distraction! – Lisa would like to replace Alana with Katherine Ryan, as we live close to her, so logistically this would be a very easy and cost effective swap.

"Alana’s replacement for Lisa would be Alan Carr as they have the same teeth and shirts."

Burke and Hare were never able to cover their supplying of fresh corpses to the medical community with late night DJing. What have you two ever done to benefit medical science?

"As luck and genetics would have it, we do a lot of work with Twin Research. Studies on twins are very important as twins are the perfect controls for researchers to identify how genes and environment affects us by comparing identical and non-identical twins. Also we can assess how environment and genes interact with each other – for example if one twin smokes or follows a particular diet, we can see how it actually affects the body. So this is a call-out for all you womb co-habiters out there; we've all had to hurdle stereotypes, struggle for our identity, share birthday cake and endure a lifetime of staring, but we can come together to change the medical world. It’s not all hot pants, touching bums and groundbreaking covers of Under Pressure."

On your showreel you compare the merits of baths and showers: Lisa is staunchly pro-bath and Alana fanatically pro-shower. Yet, when it came to the referendum you publicly didn't give a view. In all honesty we couldn't give a shit which way you voted – but did you both vote and are your bathroom choices indicative of different political views? (Don't worry, no one reads this far in an online article and you should see this as a safe-house where you can say what you want).

"It’s not all frivolity and soap-suds lovely Skinny – we present events with Youth Link Scotland and politicians to engage young people in politics. In answer to your question we’re also not resident in Scotland so couldn't vote. If you’ve scrolled down this far we’d like to cordially invite you to the Gilded Balloon bar to discuss politics and our plans to assassinate each other in our continual quest for freedom."