Al Murray: Comedy Spotlight

hallo mr briliant al murray pub landlord !! as a profesional dog ,i spend much time in pubs . is your favourite dog the british bull dog ,and how do you feel about other breeds comin in to your pub ??

"All dogs welcome. The Pork Scratching is the finest dog food of all, and one that humans can also eat."

smells are very important to me ,and pubs used to smell like heady mixture of beer and cigrettes ,but now they only smell of beer !! i think it is a shame !! do you miss stinkin like fags at the end of the day ??

"Seeing as my last pub dog, Ramrod, was taken out by passive smoking, so mixed feelings from me. Looking at smokers in a drizzle-huddle in the beer garden on a rainy afternoon you have to admire their dedication to the old death-sticks."

if you saw nigel farage kickin a dog ,what would you do ??

"I don’t care who you are, you don’t kick a dog. No matter who you are. No sir. No matter."

i am bit of a culture vulture (not literaly ,in real life i am a dog !!) and the edimbrugh fringe is hot bed of vibrant diverse art !! where do you fit in to that ??

"No idea. The great thing is everything these days is art if you say it is. A crisp packet blowing across a pavement, a sandpit crapped in by a fox is art, a moped misfiring at midnight is art. So I guess someone telling it like it is four pints in is also art. And you, a dog who’s a journalist, that’s art too."

this is one of my favorite questions for briliant performers at the fringe !! what is your favorite place in edimbrugh to do walkies ?

"Up and down the Royal Mile collecting fliers for shows and the using them as bedding for the hamster I’m looking after this summer."

if i was startin a micro brewery to make a nice 5star ale , i would call it "Schnauzerbout A Beer?" . what would your ale be called ??

"Well, the Beautiful British Beer I brought out last year was called just that."

 edimburgh has 732 pubs in it , which mean a lot of pub landlords !! will august offer you enough time to have fights with every one of them ??

"I can but try."

finaly ,you are very wise publican-politician-philosopher man !! can you give the briliant readers of the skinny one useful life tip to make them feel happy about the world ??

"The best thing in life is to lower your expectations. Aim too high and you can only miss. You aren’t going to play for your country, you aren’t going to live forever, you aren’t going to go down in history. Life is a series of endless, relentless grinding disappointments, and the sooner you get your head around that the better."