Calvin Harris, Club NME, The Arches, Glasgow, 8 March

It's a little after 11pm and the kids are alright at the Arches. =More specifically, the kids are dancing happily to 2 Manky DJ's rendition of The Gossip's latest hit, Standing in the Way of Control. Theatre Falls is a rubbish opening band, but by now the place is so packed that people are trapped, forced to look captivated by crap music. Finally at half past midnight Calvin Harris emerges in a dinosaur jumper, and the party is on! The place is overloading with ridiculously cool looking people, and the music, although not lyrically challenging, is perfect for a crowd high on alcohol. Harris jumps around like an excited monkey in front of his magical sampler, pressing buttons between swigs of water and Jack Daniels. The crowd is wild as he starts to perform his recently acclaimed future-disko hit, Acceptable in the 80s, in which he declares that he's got hugs for you if you were born in the 80s. In the next thirty minutes or so, Harris makes it very clear that he likes girls and he likes to party. And he can get away with being so cheeky because he's so damn cute. Cheers to the Arches for doing a damn good job making a Thursday night worth leaving the house for. [Lauren Mooney]