500 Reasons Why I Hate the Office by Malcolm Burgess

Here's one reason why you should hate your office: It is a cold, sterile cube where you robotically perform mundane tasks for people who are stupider and better paid than you are; your creativity and individuality are neither recognized nor encouraged which leaves you feeling asphyxiated and stifled. In short (surprise, surprise), the repetition of everyday office life eats your soul. Now, what's on page two?

I'll go ahead and spoil the mystery: on page two is more of the same unfunny, clichéd, regurgitated yak. In 211 pages Burgess obsessively beats you over the head with his trite observations like an impotent monkey bashing his pecker. Burgess offers no deeper insight into office life than, "Hey, don't you hate the office Christmas party? Who's going to snog the secretary?!?" Better to spend a week by the water cooler than read more than a page of this, and if, for some reason, you need to read a hack book about how unbearable your work life is you are just adding, masochist-like, to your woes.

And, if some thoughtless moron buys this book for you come Christmas (because you happen to work in an office - har har); grip it tight, take good aim, and throw it directly at their throat. If you are lucky, you might puncture a windpipe. And as they lie on the cold floor wheezing and gasping for breath they may think you have overreacted. Feel free to kick their kidney and explain, "I don't buy you a book called 'why I hate being an insensitive, overweight, pig bowel', do I? It's a place where people work. No one needs a book about why it sucks." [Ryan Van Winkle]