Sexual Survival Guide

Regardless of sexual orientation or how experienced (or inexperienced) you are, sexual liberation awaits if you know how to handle yourself, your surroundings and, most importantly, stay safe while throwing your knickers and inhibitions to the wind.

Flatmates

They may become your best mate or someone you just learn to get along with but it’s important to have consideration and boundaries to ensure they don’t get pissed off and wee in your cider.

Don’t shag in their bedroom without permission. No-one wants the smell of someone else’s body fluids wafting up from under the covers in the dead of night.

If you shag while they are in, you will almost definitely be heard. I once left a bedroom in the halls of residence to be greeted at the door by his mates all holding up handmade judge’s scoring cards.

Sex toys are fun and part of any healthy sexually adventurous person’s sex life but for those who share a house it’s probably a good idea to keep things down a bit when your flatmates are around if you’re a little on the bashful side. Having a vibrator that sounds like a German fighter plane, combined with Red Tube blaring from your laptop is perhaps better left until everyone’s out.

For the fellas, don’t borrow your flatmate’s porn and then wank in his room. Not cool.

Pulling

Forget about how successful or pitiful you were at pulling before you went to uni; it’s a whole different ball game now. Regardless of how hot you think you are, you may not always be successful which may cause frustration. Remember no-one likes a sex pest so be aware of the difference between being eager and being desperate.

For those of you who have a problem pulling without 10 pints, a bottle of vodka or a fistful of pills, remember all will affect performance. Droopy cocks and dry mouths aren’t particularly sexy.

Try not to go out with the intention of pulling either. It will ruin your night if you’re unsuccessful and you’re actually more likely to score if you just focus on your evening.

Sleeping around

If you’re single, you may have quite a few partners during your time at university. Condoms are a must as is discretion; no-one wants to see that they were a fantastic/duff ride on Facebook or Twitter the next day. Immature behaviour like this is more likely to get you less sex than a pat on the back. Give your partner something nasty and be assured that it’ll be all over campus and no-one will go near you for the rest of term.

Also, remember that one night stands are actually never that good in practise unless you get very lucky, so shagging your way around the halls of residence won’t actually guarantee good sex. Most importantly, enjoy it.

Experimenting

If you’re open to experimentation with the opposite or same sex, then university is a cracking place to get started. Attitudes are more liberal and you can guarantee that if you’re thinking about it, someone else is too.

However, here are a few little tips to ensure you stay safe and blush free.

Anal sex. If you stick something up your bum without having a little clear out first there is likely to be poo, so be warned.

Bondage. Being tied up by someone you don’t completely trust is a no-no. No-one wants to find themselves tied to a bed with no visible escape route.

Any kind of filming or photography with someone you’re not comfortable with isn’t advised. The last thing you need is a starring role on YouTube. My friend’s boobs ended up on a website and even though they were very nice boobs, she wasn’t amused.

And don’t forget if you’re not ready for or just don’t want to have sex then don’t. Don’t dwell on what others may be getting up to and approach it at your own pace whatever that may be.