Übermanoeuvre – Burn This

Don't allow the umlaut to fool, London's Übermanoevre fail to provide nearly as fulfilling an experience as those overpriced chocolate puddings. From the outset, the mindless riffing and faux-Californian accent sounds the worst kind of outdated – too recent for nostalgia, just old enough to re-aggravate mental scars that you hoped had healed.

The whole thing is humourless, too; the sound effects you messed about with on the Casio keyboards at school are employed with no trace of irony, genuine anger is expressed towards Monday mornings and solos are foreshadowed by such poetic MC-ing as "ah yeah, who likes bass?" Absolutely everything about this record is very, very clichéd and stupid and no, it is not endearing. Even the attempt at subversion encouraged by the album title has been done before, and probably more than once. No need to "avoid like the plague", though – this should never come anywhere near you. [Mark Holland]