Come Flyer With Me: Shinoxcy

Before we got here flyering seemed like it would be the easiest part of the festival. We’ll just be handing the nice people of Edinburgh lovely pieces of paper with photos of our faces on it, how hard could that be? Oh how naïve we were.

Me and my fellow sketch comedy ladies Alice and Sinead set off from our venue, the aptly named Finger’s Piano Bar, with a giant pink unicorn in our hands and hope in our hearts only to have all our dreams crushed. It seems that the general public get sick of performers giving them flyers after it has happened to them a dozen times or more, who knew?! People avoided making eye contact with us, ran to the other side of the street, one horrible man pretended to take a flyer then shouted NO into my face and walked away. That cut me deep.

The most interest we received was from a group of drunk rugby fans who jumped on the unicorn while grunting loudly then proceeded to kick her before parading away in a sea of aggression. Raped of our high hopes we trundled together into a park, forlorn and saddened, our unicorn weeping as we walked.

It was then we heard a beautiful sound, someone was calling out to us, someone actually wanted to talk to us! We ran towards the two men getting flyers ready and smiling from ear to ear.

“You doin’ a show?” one of them asked. It was then we realised that these two men were junkies and were so out of it they probably thought they were talking to the unicorn. They took a flyer and promised us they would definitely try to make it. We thanked them as we slowly walked backward away from them.

“And love, guess where I’m gonna keep this!” one of the men shouted at us.

“Where?” we asked hesitantly, really not wanting to know.

“Close to my heart.”

He smiled, and slipped our beautiful flyer down his trousers.

The whirlwind adventures of Shinoxcy happen at Finger's Piano Bar at 2pm each day