The Skinny on... Alison Spittle
Hella chill comic Alison Spittle answers this month’s Q&A from an A&E waiting room. No doubt it’ll end up in her next show
What’s your favourite place to visit and why?
Ooooh good question, my favourite place to visit is my granddad's house. He lives in an ex-RAF airbase in a rural part of England. It's tranquil but also directly under a military flight path so granddad is able to name the planes just by sound. I'm not into the military industrial complex but I'm into people showing off their knowledge.
Favourite food and why?
It changes all the time: the day before yesterday it was fattoush, yesterday broccoli stalks (the most underrated food stuffs). As I'm in a WhatsApp group that compares soups and named a show after soup, I'll have to say soup. I made one with heaps of pearl barley last week and it was divine.
Favourite colour and why?
Green, because when I was five I wrote a poem based on colours (it won a prize and I hold on to that victory when I'm feeling bad about the way my life has turned out). Anyway, I said black was the beautiful night above us and green was slime and it is, it's such a life-giving colour! If you saw a green planet as a space traveler it would make you feel safe. Green is go. Green is Shrek. Green is brat.
Who was your hero growing up?
Samantha Mumba, Irish pop superstar. Her song was used in a harrowing road safety advert in Ireland. Once in my twenties, she saw me walking in an industrial estate and gave me a lift to my house. It was a real full circle moment.
Whose work inspires you now?
Ultimate comedian Maria Bamford; director of Anora, Sean Baker; and rapper Tierra Whack. John Wilson's documentary TV show How To also.
What three people would you invite to your dinner party and what are you cooking?
Fern Brady, Marise Gaughan and Tamsyn Kelly, I would cook a soup and a fattoush and some jazzed up sweetcorn. They can bring dessert. I don't want a stranger at my dinner party
What’s your all time favourite album?
Mountainhead by Everything Everything. They've never brought out a dud album. Love their work.
What’s the worst film you’ve ever seen?
It's well-loved and I know I'm wrong but the film Kids gave me such a visceral reaction that I was very angry at the person for putting it on. Had to stop half way through and it messed up my whole day. You have to be open to art and the world messing you up for a bit or you'll always be on the same path.
Who or what makes you laugh the most?
Pithy memes about horrible world events.
Who’s the worst?
People who say the phrase 'the adults in the room' when talking about politics in a sincere, non nasally voice.
When did you last cry?
If we're talking eye moistening and trouble talking at a normal pace, probably yesterday while talking to a friend about something. Also, big blubs at the end of Anora.
What are you most scared of?
I'm afraid of dying of natural causes two days before the end of the world. I don't want to miss out on stuff.
When did you last vomit and why?
When talking about the concept of sour milk, I just did a little dry vom there. I watched Tarrant on TV at a pivotal age.
Edit: During this questionnaire! I'm now in an A&E waiting room. Exciting! I had my first ride in an ambulance and I've enjoyed some 'gas' for pain.
Tell us a secret?
I'm a stand-up comedian, I have no secrets, I monetise them.
Which celebrity could you take in a fight?
I don't want to fight someone, but if forced, I'd fight a celeb who I don't agree with politically and also someone I could physically overpower. So all those manosphere types.
If you could be reincarnated as an animal, which animal would it be?
A tape worm. Feels like a much lower pressured lifestyle; just eating shit and chilling, not worrying about the discourse.
What’s your favourite plant?
I love this little house plant I have that's made of polka dots. We vibe. I know he feels the same way. I would say this even if I wasn't on gas.
What are your hopes for 2025?
I hope that whatever I'm in hospital for is not serious and also that West Bromwich Albion get promotion.
Alison Spittle: high value woman WIP, Monkey Barrel, Edinburgh, 11 Jan, 6pm & 8pm, £10; The Flying Duck, Glasgow, 18 Mar, 7.30pm, £11 (part of Glasgow International Comedy Festival)
Follow Alison on Instagram and TikTok @alisonspittle