Secret Wars: Scotland v England

Secret Wars is fast becoming an international phenomenon, and this month sees the staging of the first match on Scottish soil. Originally touted as Scotland v Denmark, funding issues got in the way and grounded the Danish team, meaning a new, or rather auld enemy had to be sourced for the home side. The stakes have been raised as England has stepped into the ring to go head to head in an international paint-off in the grimy surrounds of GSA’s Vic Bar. Scottish ringleader Conzo told us what a Secret War actually is.

“It’s been going on since 2005 in London, started by a guy called Terry Guy, who still runs it. Him and Jimmy Crayon, who’s on the England team for this match. It’s toured all over Europe. It’s in Australia, and New York right now.

"There’s two teams, two on each team. Me and Vues for Scotland Jimmy Crayon and Teck 1 for England. They’ve done a lot of battles together. If we win it’ll be a big success.

"On the night, doors open at 9. Then the actual battle’s at about half ten, eleven. Artists are only allowed to use black paint with markers/brushes on a white background (normally a wall or board), no spray paint, no white paint so no mistakes. Sketches aren't allowed once the battle begins and there's an invisible line so neither artist can cross into the other team's area without their permission. The battle lasts ninety minutes.

"It’s a three point measuring system. There’s the crowd vote, measured by a decibel meter. And two guest judges, with art and design backgrounds. Best of three. In this case we’ll try and get judges who aren’t just Scottish!

"After that the party goes on til 3am. DJs, break dancers. Hopefully there won’t be any riots.
If it goes well we’ll get a tournament up here, which would be 16 Scottish artists competing for a prize at the end. I see the Glasgow art scene as very limp, and Secret Wars is a Viagra pill that’s going to shoot it up and get its hands dirty and inky. “