Brazilian Fever

Trying to bring the spirit of Rio De Janeiro to a dingy Edinburgh cabaret bar was always likely to end in tears. Particularly when that spirit takes the form of two ladies whose main skills appear to be gurning while shaking their arses in a kind of bizarre wobble-off.

After a frightening gothic acapella number reminiscent of a drunk Cruella De Vil, the pair strip into sparkly thong bikinis in order to show off maximum flesh and minimum class. After the first five minutes of booty shaking and foot stomping we get the picture – there’s no denying these girls can move, although rarely in sync. Why they have decided the best way to demonstrate this is by gyrating in the faces of unsuspecting audience members, and looking at each other as though lesbianism is about to go out of fashion remains a mystery.

The second half gets worse, with some attempt at comedy as the two mime along to ‘Underwater Love’ and continue to thrust in people’s faces.

The grand finale consists in what can only be described as a conga rape, whereby the weaker members of the audience are dragged from their seats, paraded around the bar and then marched on stage where some sort of Brazilian aerobics class takes place, until finally the girls release their victims.

This is certainly not for the faint hearted. In fact, it’s probably not suitable for anyone with a beating heart at all.