Naive New Beaters - Wallace

Album Review by Oisín Kealy | 23 Sep 2010
Album title: Wallace
Artist: Naive New Beaters
Label: Kitchenware
Release date: 4 Oct

For David Boring, Martin Luther BB King and Eurobelix of this Parisian electro-hip hop trio, the tongue – not content merely within the cheek – has burst through to the other side, leaving as it would an inarticulate and unpleasant mess. Where it stops being a parody of terrible bands and begins being its very own terrible band is a mystery. But Naive New Beaters’ biggest problem isn’t this postmodern hall of mirrors, it’s their resounding dullness.

In any good rap, either wit or speed must inform the rhymes: if you can’t say something good, at least say something fast. Unfortunately, from the cringe-worthy opener LA Trumpets through to the end, frontman Boring is exactly that as he trudges through nonsense verse while labouring over every syllable, as evidenced in Live Good: “I'm flexible to responsible. Qualifications, microwavable. And if you think I'm lying, well, you'd better game-ble.” Say what? [Oisín Kealy]

 

http://www.naivenewbeaters.com