Monster Brawl

At some point every horror fan has wondered who'd win if two headline monsters got to duking it out. Writer/director Jesse T. Cook takes that to the next level, pitching various generic movie monsters against each other in a pay-per-view style wrestling contest to settle once and for all who's the strongest.

Sadly, Freddy vs Jason this ain't and it's nowhere near as fun as it should be. It's 90 minutes of guys in Halloween costumes slugging it out in the ring with the help of the occasional cheap CGI effect. There's no overarching story and early hints at a Whedonesque self-awareness sink without trace.

Even the monsters disappoint, with only a handful resembling the horror archetypes we'd expect or doing their 'signature' moves. And why are they wrestling anyway? Small roles for some old school wrestlers might salvage things for fight fans, but this is one sorry contender that deserves to get its ass suplexed.