Around the World in 20 Drinks: Soda Special

In honour of Phagomania’s coke-fuelled bacon-making, we thought we’d take a brief spin around this whole wide world to pick out some of the weirdest sodas available today. So strap yourselves in, because it’s going to be a rough ride. Seriously, that’s not just a poorly stretched metaphor, it’s the truth – this column may make you feel truly terrible. Don’t believe me? OK.

Placenta juice. That’s right. Placenta, in a juice. It’s marketed as a health drink in Japan, and comes in a lovely golden bottle. The other ingredients actually sound quite nice: kiwi fruit, caramel, honey... All good choices, things are going well. Then you scan back and read ‘pig’s placenta.’ Anyway, best not dwell on it, let’s just see what’s next on the list.

Cow urine. The urine of a cow, in a glass, with some other stuff. It’s called Gau Jal, and it’s currently under development in India. Apparently, cow urine has medicinal properties, and these are what many of today’s non-urine-based soft drinks are missing. If you think this sounds strange already, here’s the stranger part: this drink is being punted by an extremist Hindu paramilitary group. A paramilitary that has a side interest in nabbing some market share from Pepsi and Coca-Cola. Which brings us neatly on to...

Yoghurt-flavoured Pepsi. Part of the notorious family of bizarre seasonal Japanese Pepsi variants, this bad boy made its way into our hearts as well as to that bit at the back of our throats that sometimes tastes of vomit back in 2011. Sadly, its crystal-clear blend of creamy yoghurt and unspecified sweetness left us too soon, like a candle in the wind – but our final offering has stood the test of time. It's a Vietnamese speciality called the Bird’s Nest drink. What to do is: get a glass, add some condensed milk and an egg yolk, then fill ’er up with some soda water. Given the South Asian heat and the horrendous curdling, we can’t imagine a straw would do much good in the circumstances, but you could give it a go. What’s the alternative? A fruit juice? A refreshing glass of water? Pffft. Pass me a Bird's Nest, and a knife and fork.