Edinburgh Festivals Food & Drink events guide

We dive deep into the 2015 Edinburgh Festival Fringe programme, and emerge holding an expertly-carved piece of fruit, gallons of alcohol and a radioactive teapot

Feature by Peter Simpson | 31 Jul 2015

Edinburgh in August is a little bit like a real-life Advent calendar – open a door, any door, and there’s bound to be some kind of crazy festive scene kicking off behind it. With so much to see and do, we felt it was only right to try and guide you through the morass of the festivals, past the belligerent street teams and folk dressed as Predator, and towards the stuff that’s to do with food and drink.

So let's go in at the deep end, with a show promising 'absurdity, gourmandise and cannibalism'. In FEAST, physical theatre company Clout plan to show off the nature of man’s humanity and our collective evolution through the prism of breakfast, lunch and dinner – having long believed that you can tell a lot about a person by what/how/where they eat, we are on board with these clowns. There’s a sentence you don’t get to write eleven months of the year. Zoo, 140 The Pleasance (Venue 124), 7-20 & 22-31 Aug, 3.55pm, £10 (£8).

Next, a man who judges other people by what he eats – Jay Rayner, Observer food critic and sometime-berater of Masterchef contestants, who will be discussing our enduring love of the negative restaurant review. He’ll also fill us all in on some of his least favourite meals, while also sharing some of the bad reviews he’s received over the years so as to take the edge off proceedings somewhat. Assembly Rooms, George St (Venue 20), 24 Aug, 12.45pm, £12.

But say you’re the kind of person who doesn’t take joy from picking apart other people’s work – you feel it’s 'unbecoming'. Well, we’ve got you covered with a pair of foodie events that are more constructive than destructive. First, there’s Wild, Scottish And Free, looking at the wild food movement that’s been responsible for the continued use of the word ‘micro-herb’ in food television for the past few years. This one-off will challenge chefs, nutritionists and botanists to devise a Scottish cuisine based on indigenous wild plants and animals – if you ever wanted definitive guidance on which of the items in your garden are edible, this is the show for you. Stand in The Square, St Andrew Sq Gardens (Venue 372), 20 Aug, 3pm, £8 (£7).

For a more exotic but equally productive afternoon, head to Krua Thai Cookery School’s masterclass in Thai Cookery and Fruit Carving. You’ll learn some trade secrets from a top-class Thai chef, try some dishes, and find out how to carve a melon to make it look like a bunch of flowers – always a good skill to have in your back pocket. Krua Thai Cookery School, 19 Liberton Brae (Venue 376), 3-31 Aug (except 6, 13, 20, 27), various times, £25 (£20).

Of course, the world of food isn’t all exquisite fruit carving and shouting at people for getting your dinner wrong – it has a dark side, which is explored in a pair of events at this month’s Edinburgh International Book Festival. In Dark Secrets of the Food Industry, investigative journalist Joanna Blythman looks at the world of food processing and unveils some of the tweaks and tricks used to make our food look suspiciously perfect. Earlier on the same day, genetic epidemiology professor Tim Spector takes on dieting and obesity in a discussion on his new book The Diet Myth. Spector will set out research that suggests that it’s the bacteria in our own guts that may hold the key to fighting the flab. Damn microbes – we always knew it was you! Charlotte Sq Gardens, Fri 21 Aug, 2.15pm and 12.15pm, £10 (£8)

While we’ve got those microbes bang to rights, when it comes to Russian dissident Alexander Litvinenko – famously iced with a radioactive cup of tea in a London cafe – we have neither the information, nor the desire to get a friendly visit from the FSB, to hazard a guess as to the culprits. For the investigators amongst you, 2Magpies’ production of The Litvinenko Project at the Summerhall cafe will offer a dramatic reconstruction of the Russian’s fateful trip to the Millennium Hotel, complete with real (non-radioactive) tea. Summerhall, 1 Summerhall Pl (Venue 26), 14-30 Aug (except 20 & 27), 8pm, £10 (£8).

And if tales of nuclear tea attack have put you off hotel food, comedian George Egg has some advice for you. In Anarchist Cook, Egg shows just what you can make with the equipment left lying in your average hotel room, from pancakes cooked on the back of an iron to scrambled eggs made in the hotel kettle. Your ingenuity will soon know no bounds – just try not to get bits of fish everywhere. Gilded Balloon, Bristo Sq (Venue 14), 5-31 Aug (except 17 & 24), 2.45pm, £9.50/8.50 (£8/7).

While those food folk get all esoteric and political, the drink-based contingent at the Fringe tend to be more straightforward. Take, for example, Drink! The Musical. It’s a musical about the issues raised and problems faced when people drink too much. No chance of getting confused there, which in the chaos of August is a good thing indeed. Sweet Grassmarket, 61 The Grassmarket (Venue 18), 13-16 Aug, 12.50pm, £8 (£6).

Then there’s Shit-Faced Shakespeare, a show in which – yep, you guessed it – a performer gets very very drunk then takes on the Bard. Not literally, as he’s long dead, but given the circumstances it wouldn’t be an enormous surprise if things were to 'kick off'. Not content with taking on Shakespeare, the team behind S-FS are also having an alcohol-inspired bash at showtunes this year in Shit-Faced Showtime, which promises an “all singing, all drinking, musical”. Not sure that’s exactly what will come of that, but it couldn’t hurt to find out. Well, couldn’t hurt the audience, anyway. Underbelly George Sq & Med Quad, 5-31 Aug (except 17), 9.35pm and 6.45pm, £14.50 (£13.50) / £12 (£10).

Shit-facedness aside, there are a pair of drink-related shows from which you might actually learn something. First up is comedian Susan Morrison’s Scotland in Six Swallies, detailing the six drinks which have influenced the history and culture of this here country. With a directorial role at history festival Previously… and a past show on her love of the Titanic, Morrison has the historical chops to back up the laughs, while at the same time promising “alcohol is involved… this will not be entirely serious.” That, friends, is promotional blurb which we can get on board with. Stand in The Square, 11 Aug, 3pm, £8 (£7).

And finally, a show that promises booze, hilarity and an insight into the life of a 1980s wrestling phenomenon. The Thinking Drinkers' Guide to the Legends of Liquor talks us through the drinking habits of Teddy Roosevelt, Dorothy Parker, Andre the Giant and Jesus Christ over the course of one hour and five free drinks. Yes, the Edinburgh Fringe may be a busy and treacherous place, but any event that offers booze, comedy AND Andre the Giant banter in one room is alright by us. Pleasance Courtyard, Pleasance (Venue 33), 5-31 Aug (except 17), 6.40pm, £11.50 (£10.50).

http://theskinny.co.uk/food